To many people artists seem / undisciplined and lawless. / Such laziness, with such great gifts, / seems little short of crime. / One mystery is how they make / the things they make so flawless; / another, what they’re doing with / their energy and time. – Twin Mystery, by Piet Hein, poet and scientist (1905-1996)

What’s the difference between an artist and a craftsperson? A craftsperson gets paid *before* they die.

I’ve been busy of late, as I’m sure is obvious from my lack of posts. Sometimes it’s difficult to post because every minute my hands are on the keyboard means my hands are NOT on my crochet hook. I just recently finished up an entry for Threadknits (more on this later) that I hope will do well. Currently I’m working on a Seth and an Anubis from Egyptian mythology, also a commission based on Anubis. This weekend I hope to finish up Pyramid Head’s knife (yes, the never-ending commission Pyramid Head), slap some red paint on him and his “victim”, take pictures and get him off to his new happy home.

I’ve decided to start getting up at 7AM in the hopes of getting more done. No more lazy mornings, no more snooze button — all an attempt to get more done and finish some commissions that need doing. Hopefully some pictures soon.

Also, I’ve updated my etsy shop with a lot of dolls that I’ve wanted to sell. Give it a look, if you will.

Tags: courage, crochet, Egyptian Gods, gonzo, pyramid head, sleep

So I’m still here. It’s been a bit, I know. I’ll try to be better about it in the future. Right after the new year we had to titrate my meds again (more crazy makes me need more meds) and that takes a bit to get used to. Plus I also had some sort of sinus stuff that tried to eat my face off. Sinus stuff + new meds = broke down worn out Vox fit for nothing more than forcing herself to go to the RealJob and then coming home and sitting on the couch and crocheting granny squares until her brains fall out.

But now I’m better. *twitch*

Anyhoo, since this blog is all about saying things that I want to say (other than those that will scare horses and permanently scar the family members that I like) I thought I’d review the opening themes of two anime series that I enjoy.

Read the rest of this entry »

Tags: anime, commissions, crochet, illness, medication, medicines

I was poisoned on Thanksgiving. I’ve been utterly sick and completely useless for at least six days because of this. I was given something contaminated with gluten, and I went through a pretty decent Hell because of it.

Thursday, day 1: Within 5 minutes of eating the contaminated food I was nauseated, cramping, and having brainfog and overall numbness. My fine motor skills were entirely shot and I was shaking so hard you could hear it in my voice. I couldn’t think to save my life; I spent the rest of the day on the couch under a blanket, playing easy DS games and watching mindless DVDs.

Friday, day 2 of severe glutenation: Nausea, migraine, shaking, stomach pain, fatigue and muscle weakness. Also, some paranoia. I was on my feet a total of eight times that day — once from the bed to the couch, three restroom trips, and once back to the bed from the couch.. It’s a short walk that took me about 5 minutes each way; my legs were so weak I can barely stand.

I could not drive, or walk, or stand up for an extended period. Early in the day I could not even hold a crochet hook because my wrists and arms hurt so badly.

Saturday, day 3: Still nauseated, weak and tired. I remember that this was the first day I was even strong enough to sit up unaided or without being propped up by pillows. That stunning achievement was reached midday, for several minutes at a time.

I was not able to walk or drive for any length of time. Thank gods a good friend of ours was able to come by and take the husband out to get groceries and other needful things for us.

Sunday, day 4: Still flu-like symptoms, short temper, still very weak. I did however have the strength (by the end of the day) to stand up long enough to take my first shower since the glutening. If you do the math, it’s not pretty.

Monday, day 5: My immune system and digestive tract are fired. Woke up sore all over; weak and in pain. I went to my doctor who made soothing noises (she is a joy and a comfort) and gave me steroids to stop the over-reactive immune response. My herbalist (also a joy and a comfort) gave me oregano to prevent a fungal infection — steroids have that effect sometimes — and peppermint oil for my ongoing nausea. All the driving nearly did me in, however. Went to bed early and happy about it.

Tuesday, day 6: Stuffed full of steroids. About 60% back to “normal”. Head hurt, thoughts racing, and crying jags like whoa. Fun! I think I made the right decision to stay home, no matter how worried about money I am. When a scene from “Death to Smoochy” makes me tear up, I’m in no condition to deal with the outside world.

Wednesday, day 7: Went to work, like the brave little toaster I am. Still pretty sore. Pretty nauseated (but the peppermint oil does certainly help). My head does weird things if I move it too quickly. I’m tired and I have no appetite — probably for the good.

All this peppermint is making me want Mint Chocolate ice cream, though.

It sounds so incredibly simple and trite when I write it all out like this. Nothing can describe a full week of feeling like I’m in a tumble-dryer full of rocks for hours on end.

And I can’t do this anymore. Luckily I will get paid for the holiday, but missing 3 days of work is a substantial amount and I can’t afford repeats of this happy little adventure. I’ve got to keep my food safely under my control. If that means not eating with family or not eating out at restaurants or not eating at work functions or parties with friends… then so be it. Any amount of transient personal embarrassment or even a little hardship between me and other people not as supportive of my condition is worth it rather than face a week of hell and another 4-7 days of discomfort.

I’m amazed that some people think that celiacs are doing this “just for attention”. I would like to give such ignorant savages some attention in return.

With a baseball bat. For a few hours.

Tags: crochet, gluten, illness, life, sleep

I wish I had a flashlight.

If I had a flashlight, I could find my USB game controller and that way I could play Actraiser on my laptop. I wouldn’t have to turn on the light and risk waking the husband, who has a test tomorrow. I’ve got the actual Actraiser cartridge for SNES (around here in one of probably 20 boxes), but I would want to play it on emulation so I can cheat bawls off.

And I want to play Actraiser because I’ve got some of the music stuck in my head. I can’t remember if the song is from the Fillmore battle area or the Bloodpool battle area or even the very last battle area. But it’s driving and pretty, in only the way a Japanese 16 bit midi can be.

There’s just simply no way to play Actraiser without the controller, and the controller is in a tangled box of electronics and I have no flashlight. We used to have a small one that we kept beside the bed, but I don’t know where it went. And we used to have a big one that we kept under the bed, but it’s like 10,000 watts and I could flag down passing jets with it, so I would almost be less obnoxious by turning on the lights.

I *could* turn my laptop screen in the direction of the Box O’ Cords and try to navigate by its sterile yet comforting LED light. It’s a thought to be reserved.

There aren’t too many dolls to be made out of the Actraiser characters. There’s really only the Hero itself to
create. Hmm. Call this research?

*immediately goes to download screen captures of the hero*

Bad Vox. Add to the list of things you are Not Allowed to Make.

Hmm. Well, I could begin work on a personal project, due to the fact that I have an LED light-up crochet hook (NOW THAT’S GONZO!)… in fact, I might be able to use it as a flashlight.

Now there’s an interesting balance to find: should I play video games that I can’t use for design fodder, or should I crochet something that may take hours and bore me to tears (that being the voluminous petticoats of the Light Queen)?

Until I decide, I may just play solitaire and read a fan shrine to Actraiser.

Wow, Actraiser had some messed up monsters.

Now, let’s research medieval tapestries, being that I’ve wanted to do my own spin on them. Either make characters from tapestries into dolls, or make a crocheted tapestry (more on this later). Five minutes later, Google has given me more tapestries than I could ever work with in one lifetime — along with the dubious delights of Tapestry Masterpieces and Geoff. Chaucer as a private eye.

Your guess is as good as mine or probably better at this time of morning.

***

Another ten minutes pass; my solitaire game is sadly neglected. In the deep dark reaches of the night StumbleUpon is my best friend. The close dear friend that keeps me entertained and simultaneously lets me blame them for my lack of productivity.

Spent ten more minutes picking the perfect theme for my iGoogle page. We can go ahead and chalk that up to “rearranging workspace for greater ergonomic ease in use.” The Audubon Birds of Prey theme was beginning to bore me; I never saw them swoop on anything.

It’s 2:40 AM and I think my brain is melting.

*************

Here’s where the manuscript tapers off, with blurred references to eye-laser beams and “ladyfingers”. It’s best not to speculate on the final sanity of the subject.

Tags: actraiser, crochet, illness, insomnia, sleep

Birds gotta fly. Fish gotta swim. Dogs gotta hunt.

Vox gotta crochet.

I don’t know if you’ve ever been in this position, but if you have you’ll know what I mean. Ever done something and known immediately that this is what you were *created* on this earth to do? Ever felt that heady rush of knowing that you are a unique shaped peg in a unique shape hole — right where you need to be, at the right time, saying the right words, making the right motions? As if the universe itself could find no better thing for you to be than exactly what you are?

Serendipity. It all suddenly gels.

Sometimes I get that feeling. I know yarn. I love yarn. I can make yarn jump through hoops, sit up and beg. And while I can intellectually contemplate being bored with yarn and/or running out of ideas in about a few hundred years, I can’t actually imagine it.

If you haven’t had this marvelous feeling, I pity you a little… but I envy you too. Sometimes it’s the most frustrating emotion in the world because it drives you. It whips you like a merciless charioteer until you drop in your traces, covered in sweat and fatigue.

Today I finished a design that’s been bothering me for at least two years now: sturdy, realistic butterfly wings. Today it was like the angels singing — everything came together, and I fastened them to the doll, and they were PERFECT. And with that rush of absolute glee came three or four more ideas fast on its heels. A door has opened in this magnificent labyrinth of my own design, and there is MORE behind it.

You gotta do what you’re born to do. Anything else is a crime against your nature.

But sometimes it’s a necessary crime.

Exhilaration doesn’t always put money in the bank account. Serendipity doesn’t always pay the rent. It’s an unfortunate side effect of society that an action performed only *very well* sometimes pays much more than one performed in *absolute genius*.

Buddha does come back from Nirvana, to do what must be done. I’m glad that I can provide for my family. I’m glad that I have a RealJob(TM) and I can get rent and food and clothing and fuel and insurance and pay off old debts.

I’m also glad that my passion pays for itself, and more besides.

Ever got that feeling, that you were made for *something*, and that you’d finally found out what it was?

Tags: bless me yarn art, crochet, gonzo, life, RealJob(TM)

Alrighty, it’s the end of the year and what that means for business is that I have only SIX commissions left before I close my list for an indefinite period of time. When I reopen them in 2010, I will have fewer commissions at a higher fee.

So if you’ve ever wanted any of my works, now is the time to secure your place. Current starting price is $55 for my regular commissions, and $10 shipping within the US. You can also get rush status (within 3 months of receipt of payment) for an additional $30 per rushed item.

When I have the six commissions or we reach December 31st 2009, my list will be closed until I finish my current commissions — at this point, probably at least until July – October 2009. When I reopen, my base price will start at $100 per commission.

So email me at voxmortuum @ gmail.com to let me know what you’re wanting and we’ll work out the details.

Tags: bless me yarn art, commissions, crochet

Today will be a rather general post, because frankly I’m feeling like I don’t have enough medication today. I had something planned for the day but after 3 hours solid of driving, 2 hours of laundry, enough emotional ups and downs to make an amusement park full of roller-coasters… I just don’t have it in me right now.

Yesterday was a bit more exciting. I think I like Cherrycola Red Heart Yarn. I think I like, MORE THAN like it. I think I’m in love with it. So I’m working on an afghan with it. Only problem is, I only had 3 skeins of it and I needed more like another 15 or so.

So the husband and I went on The Great American Yarn Hunt. We had two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high-powered blotter acid –

Sorry, I spaced there for a minute and thought I was going to Vegas. We didn’t actually have any of that. But what we had was a rabid desire to find Cherrycola.

We went to:
1 Walmart
2 Michaels
1 Hobby Lobby
1 Joann’s

And at Joann’s we hit the jackpot. Not only did we find Cherrycola… not only did we find 15 skeins of it… it was ON SALE. Usually I don’t like Joann’s because their selection of yarn (at least, the location in my area) is not the most choice, but this time they did right by us.

Now that’s gonzo. *grins*

Also at Joann’s I got a skein of Williamsburg Print (also Red Heart) and 4 skeins of Sensations Rainbow Boucle in Red Print.

Now, working with the Rainbow Boucle, I can tell you that the yarn itself is a dream. It goes along just fine with my trusty I-hook, it’s softer than unicorn farts (which are pretty darn soft, take my word for it) and all in all just a total delight to crochet… UNTIL IT KNOTS.

Because of all the little boucles (I assume that’s what they’re called), it ties itself into little knots due to the terrible friction deep in the heart of a yarn skein. And you have to GENTLY ease them apart or the whole thread just breaks. Luckily I’ve only had this happen once; I have a way with yarn.

Sooooooo… projects for this next week:

Finish up Pyramid Head from Silent Hill
Finish Reno from Final Fantasy 7
Finish up something INCREDIBLYFREAKINGPINK.

Then take some pictures and ship some things out. Oh, and that whole RealJob(tm) thing I’ve got to do until I can buy my own yarn shop.

Tags: bless me yarn art, crochet, Final Fantasy, gonzo, pyramid head, the stash

Bless me, Yarn Art, for I have sinned. Tonight I bought a LOOOOOOTTTT of yarn. I mean a LOT a lot ALOT.

Let me recount my crimes to you:
2 Skeins Linen
1 Skein Melonberry (new color!)
2 Skeins Cherrycola (another new color!)
1 Skein Light Raspberry
2 HYOOGE Skeins Coffee (it’s for a project. I’m serious.)
1 HYOOGE Skein Buff (I make naked people with it. And then I clothe them.)
1 Skein Shocking Pink (and yes, it is.)
2 Skeins Marrakesh (yet another new color!)
1 Skein Tea Leaf (is it new, or just new to me? Don’t know, don’t care! FOUR new colors, a ha ha ha!)

And now all I can do is sit around clutching my expanded stash and chortling like a junkie.

I don’t normally buy this much yarn in one go; tonight I will say five Hail Red Hearts and ten Our Dye Lots.

I’m assuming the glass of blackberry wine I’m having may have something to do with all this.

I have a secret: I hate to weave in ends. I’ll do whatever I can to avoid it. When I’m doing a flat piece, I crochet over the ends. When I’m making a doll, I pull the ends inside the body.

It’s called “Crochet”, not “Crochet for a little while and then weave in several thousand tails.”

I also hate to sew things together. I would always rather crochet them together, as in the case of doll parts or afghan squares. If I wanted to flip a needle through something over and over, I would have taken up cross stitch, needlepoint, embroidery, hard drug abuse, etc.

Tomorrow I have dubbed “Finished Object Friday”, and will post accordingly. FEAR MY MIGHTY FINISHED WRATH!

Tags: bless me yarn art, crochet, the stash

Lately I’ve purchased two new crochet books, as if I didn’t have enough — the first being Crochet Bouquet: Easy Designs for Dozens of Flowers by Suzann Thompson.

Let me start by saying that the front of the book is more detailed than the images on Amazon led me to believe, which is good. What had been blobs of multicolor in the preview image were now pictures clear enough to see stitches and really give an idea of what sort of work is inside.

Suzann spends a few pages at the beginning going over basics, tools, etc; most of which should be old hat by now for fairly experienced hookers, but I did still find a few tidbits relevant to the flower-making itself that were good to know.

A complaint I have about the book is that there are no diagrams along with the patterns; I’m a visual learner and I grasp things much better if I’m shown rather than told. Nonetheless, the designs look fairly straightforward. The colors and yarn choices are inspiring (they have my brain bubbling for more patterns and finished objects), and I’m especially looking at the “Oval Center Rose” beginning a crocheted tribute afghan to Revolutionary Girl Utena – The Rose Collection Vol. 1 and the Ohtori rose.

Some of the designs are less realistic than “funky”; I guess it’s a good thing that the 70′s are coming back… But these are only a few projects in the book, and all in all I’m impressed with the thought Suzann has put into the various floral items. Orchids, mums, daisies, daffodils, several different types of rose — all beautiful and exceedingly lifelike, for fiber art.

I do *adore* the last section of the book, which is full of FOLIAGE options. I feel like leaves and vines are a bit neglected in floral design books; authors underestimate the curving beauty of an ivy or grape vine. (No, I don’t have some sort of “vine fetish”. Stop asking.)

All in all, I think this book was worth bringing into my private library. Although she does give a few usage ideas for her lovely florals, I really would have loved to see some more modular options for incorporating in scarves, afghans, etc. She has left this as an exercise to the reader, so it’s lucky that THIS particular reader is a designer in her own right. My subscribers should certainly expect to see some of Suzann’s work brought into my own free patterns over at A Page A Day soon.

Tags: book review, crochet, flowers

I have been crocheting, but you wouldn’t know it from my posting. *wry look* I finished up two doll bodies for my Egyptian Gods series. I have finished 2 crocheted squares and have developed 3 square designs for a theme afghan.

I’ve also done a lot of work on a character from Deathnote, Matt. All he needs now are some finishing touches on his jacket, his glasses, and his gloves. Then he’ll be ready to ship off to the commissioner.

Next, I’ll be finishing up a Pyramid Head doll (from the movie Silent Hill) and a random VERYPINK Fairy Godmother, and so on from there.

My darling husband/webmaster took a TON of pictures last night of some new dolls: my Spider Jerusalem, the crocheted Bowel Disruptor I carried to Dragon*Con, the Dark Queen and Dark Rook from the Fantasy Chess Set I’m developing (you know, in my COPIOUS spare time…), and the Sephiroth I just completed.

I hope to post some pictures of my work soon, and also post more serious content soon. I thought I would have time to develop it, but between work at the RealJob(tm) and various dramas occurring in my sphere I’m lucky to just get the chance to indulge my fixpick up my crochet work every now and again.

Apropos of nothing, I think I’ve lost yet another pair of scissors in my couch. I do most of my work on my couch (since I don’t have a spare room yet for the huge stash of art supplies that owns me), and every week or so I’m losing hooks or other tools down in the cushions. At least this time it wasn’t the Titanium-Coated Shears of Doom.

More on them and everything else later; time to get ready to go to that RealJob(tm) I was talking about…

Tags: bowel disruptor, crochet, Dark Queen, Dark Rook, deathnote, Egyptian Gods, Fantasy Chess Set, life, pyramid head, Sephiroth, Shears of Doom, Spider Jerusalem